Silly humans

I've tried to fake it, but am hardly stoic.
If I pretended it wasn't happening,
I'd miss the best part!
Silly humans. Questioning smiles.
Isn't this what we live for?

Sexy Sadie, what have you done?

There hasn’t been much to say lately, so I’ve been on blog-hiatus, assuming you’d rather wait to read about something fun, political, or intellectual, instead of hearing me blabber on about the minutia of my daily life. But today I couldn’t resist. So if the exciting or profound is what you’re looking for, stop reading now—this post contains none of it. I’m just writing for no particular reason at all. Well, unless “I have some time” counts as a reason.

After watching the UConn Women’s Basketball team take the NCAA tournament last night, (Go Huskies! Woof!), I was up far too late, drinking too much beer and having too much fun. (What a fucked-up phrase, “too much fun,” as if that’s possible.) This of course left me groggy-eyed and hazy-brained this morning as I got ready for my early-mornin’ yoga class. You ever get that tired-delirium sensation that leaves you somewhat out of it, but in a fun, stoned-feeling kind of way? That’s how I felt this morning—and for what it’s worth, it made for a fab yoga practice. All in all though—a pretty normal morning. Well kind of. There are some major details that I’m going to spare you, not one of which is: I think I got my period. And the only reason that is strange is because it’s been about three or four months since I’ve had it. Whatever, it was bound to happen again sometime, so no biggie. In with the cotton-rocket, and out the door to start my day.

Aside from the sleepy, I was off to a good morning, starting with a great yoga practice. After yoga I had some time to kill before school, so I stopped at Starbucks for a cup of coffee. I also caught up on some work, did some people watching and conversation-eavesdropping, and then left for my theory class. Well, I tried to leave for class, but Sadie (my car) decided she wasn’t havin’ it. A turn of the key led to a chug-chug-bounce-clop-blehhhhh…and within moments, she’d had enough. No more starting for Sadie. Bye-bye Sadie.

Within forty minutes or so, AAA came out to tow me to Tony’s Garage, a place I’ve come to frequent every few weeks, so they’ve kind of become like family. Picture good ol’ Italian boys with the likes of Journey and Boston blaring in the background, the smell of rubber and grease that delivers an odd sense of familiarity to even those of us who don’t understand cars at all. Before Paulo (AAA guy) arrived with his truck I tried to start Sadie a few more times, just to give her the benefit of the doubt, but to my chagrin she held steadfast with the not-starting. So I hung out in the Starbucks parking lot, made a few phone calls, texted (is it texted? or text? I never know) some friends and waited. Paulo arrived to check her out, looked under the hood, and then sat down in the driver’s seat to try and start it—just to check—and lo and behold: Sadie sprang back to life.

So feeling like a total douche, I thanked Paulo and headed to Tony’s anyway, just to have ‘em take a look. Joking around with my guys—as usual, I received a warm and happy welcome—I looked out the window: It’s fucking snowing. Snowing! Yep. Meanwhile, my guys, seemingly unphased by the snow, tell me they need about a half hour or so before they can look at Sadie, so I decide to take off for the grocery store to save myself time later in the afternoon. Sadie starts again (go girl!), and I head to the Big Y, eventually pulling into the parking lot where I realize I don’t have my wallet (in my pants from last night, damnit! And go huskies!). I pause to laugh at myself and notice it is now suddenly sunny. Clear blue sky. Weird. But whatever, I’ll trade a missing wallet for sunshine any day. Plus, I figure by now I’ve wasted enough time, and can head back to Tony’s. So I put my sunglasses on and dip out.

On the way back, I’m still slightly puzzled by Sadie’s newest idiosyncrasy and the surrealness that is becoming my day—and I realize it’s awfully quiet. I go to turn up the stereo, and…. Yep, you guessed it. Nothing. Bye-bye stereo. No radio, no Ipod connection, no CD, no-whatever-the-hell-that-auxiliary-setting-is-for. I pressed all the buttons at least one hundred times, and nothing. Eh, whatever. A peaceful drive never hurt anyone. And at least it’s not snowing anymore (though the blue sky has now turned back to gray).

Now I’m back at the shop, planning to be camped out for a couple of hours—at least I have some food and the work I need to catch up on. I go to grab my lunch in my backpack…. Right. Of course. Lunch is sitting at home on my kitchen counter. Okay, some gum then? Nah, finished that yesterday. But I have water. Water is good. Everyone loves water. And I do have the stuff I need to get some work done (though I ended up writing this blog instead). A full Nalgene bottle of water later, and still in a sleepy-delirium state—which seems to be intensifying as the day goes on (that, or maybe someone slipped acid in my coffee earlier?)—I get up to pee. Turns out, my period has magically stopped. Maybe it will be back later. Maybe not. Maybe my car will start or maybe it won’t. Maybe my radio will play. Maybe it will rain. Maybe I should have asked if Tony’s takes checks. Maybe I will win the lottery.

There is no moral to this story, only pointless babbling about the oddities of this particular five hours of my life (that’s right, it’s not even 1:30 yet). I guess sometimes, when there is absolutely nothing to say and nothing of actual interest to write, there’s not much one can do but tell about life exactly as it happens. In this instance, this includes: I’m hungry and could use a shower. My face is kinda dry and splotchy on the left side and I’m not quite sure why. I wonder what my cats are doing and whether my friends know that I miss them. I wonder how many years until my hands get wrinkly. I wonder if people laugh at themselves the way I laugh at myself, and wonder if I’m really as funny as I think I am. I wonder if Elijah would care that I often celebrate Passover with margaritas. I wonder why sometimes it’s easy to feel like you’re on drugs, even though you don’t really do them much anymore.

Insignificant moments can be pretty fuckin’ funny when you look at them right. It’s now almost 1:30 in the afternoon, and there’s no telling what the rest of this day will bring (though a finished Quant paper would be nice). So far I’ve had a period, a dead car, seen snow, been laughed at by a tow-truck man, practiced yoga, felt the sunshine on my face, lost a stereo, misplaced a wallet, written part of a paper, missed a class, hung out in a mechanic’s shop, a coffee shop, and two parking lots. So wherever you go, go with a sense of humor. Shrug your shoulders and give in to life. You can’t possibly know what’s coming, so just go with the day and laugh at the sun. Or, in some cases, the snow. And when in doubt, be happy. Like Jerry said, sometimes there’s “Nothin’ left to do but smile, smile, smile.”